i shouldn't, but I just did.

photo

I love this picture.
So amature.
So not porn.
Love it mucho <3

a girl can dream but she can never escape.

Salvan


bleh.bleh.urgh.

fatdogs

In all great happiness there is sorrow.
I know that everything is gonna be alright,
but I really dislike the situation right now.
I really need some help.

Or some sedatives.

take me to the beach.


fatbrides, eyela

this is where i spend my days with my prince charming.


nipple slip.

fatbrides

alejandro.



Gonna find me a hot Brazilian man who can sponsor my Lambada lessons! ;)

the sky's the limit.


there are a lot of things right with your life. give your attention to them and they will grow.

PhotobucketPhotobucketPhotobucketPhotobucketPhotobucket
via Bella 185

glad midsommar.



via venom venin

ridin' solo.



This song is like an in-joke between me and a friend.

i stand corrected.



Thank you Life.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.

i'm still very pissed. in a sad way. (abreact)

Are you happy now?
I did your dirty work for you.
It's what you been wanting and waiting for.
Now you can go and fuck yourself.

I'm mad over the fact that you've already decided in your mind that it won't work, and that you after telling me that kept on talking to me anyway.
I, who thought that a friend who just broke all contact with me without any reason was evil, this is by far worse.
Why hang on? Why hang on when you know I'm hurting?
Or maybe you didn't know? Either way hurts me.
I wish you could hear and realize how painfully honest and unsympathetic you've been to me and understand why I've been acting the way I have and understand that I have tried.
But I'm human, I've got fucking feelings, and to have stand by your cold-hearted comments as long as I've done makes me completely stupidly naive!

You know what, I'm glad I'm not the bad guy in this story.
I'm even glad I don't have to have any more closure to this than writing this post that you may or may not even read.
It's been over a long time ago. And I hate you for it. You are such an asshole.
I hope you know it.

I'm also mad at myself... the things you said to me makes me seem so stupid.
The things you said still hurts, and I've been waiting for you to end it; the job I just did for you.
It makes me believe that you were scared and unsure too. It's just that your way of dealing with all this was to blame and lay everything on the other person so you can look good in your eyes. Saying that: I don't "see" you, that I don't want to see you, that I'm not actually trying to know you.
You know what that reads? It reads that you have a huge fucking wall and that you won't help me jump over it!
It's nothing wrong with me, it's you! And you know it, but instead of admitting it you blame me.
Because, from your point of view: you are always right, never wrong. Your way is the best way.
Is it really? Especially when hurting people?

Denying that you are wrong is the weakest thing you can do in life.
And blaming others for your faults is even worse.

That's all I have to say, the grudge I've held inside thinking that if I let it out I will hurt you (yes, that's how fucking nice I am). Because my morals and values says: if you have something negative/bad or hurting to say, it's best to say nothing at all, 'cause maybe the situation gets better.

Well, the situation never got better, and you kept on picking and pulling my last strings.
And my kindness couldn't hold on to something that is meant to be and has already been decided by you.
You know, thoughts rules actions.
The moment you said to me, "we'll probably loose contact", that's the moment you decided - without me - that all hope is lost. There's no reason for me to fight when you've already in your mind made up that our friendship will be lost. And even before when you said, "I don't know", that meant of course, "no, we will stop talking after high school".

We would have had a much better friendship if you really deeply knew that you wanted to have me in your life fifty more years. Thoughts rules actions.
It didn't have to end like this.
Even when you move abroad and we'll see less of each other. In this day and age, what are you thinking?
You know plenty of people in the US, and you call them friends! Why can't I be your friend when you live in America and I in Sweden, what's the fucking difference?!
I don't get your thinking... or wait, I do. That's your polite way of saying: I don't want you in my life, please understand and let me go.
Fuck you.

It feels so much better now, getting it all down, black on white.
I've been going around with this sorrow mourning over our lost friendship, being angry and confused why it's coming to an end. I never wanted it to end. I actually counted you in as one of the very few people I'll still be friends with after high school. And I hoped that our friendship would grow, even when you move abroad, and God knows I won't either sit on my bum the rest of my life in Stockholm.
And I thought that, with all this social communications, Skype, Twitter, Facebook, Mail, Dailybooth, Blogs, everything, that we'll find a way to stay in touch and up to date with what's going on with our lives.

It makes me sad that you didn't want that too.
It makes me sad that a girl comes into your life and few others and you start bit by bit neglecting me and being mean to me, just because you've found people who understands you better doesn't mean you have the right to treat me this way.
And you say that that's your humor, deal with it. Well, you're much nicer to those other friends of yours, while I'm the one who has to put up with all your shit watching you underestimate me time after time.
You would also get tired after many "sigh"-s and "didn't you know that?", you were actually much nicer to me before, and that's the person I miss.

You don't have to say anything, I've heard all you have had to say.
I don't want to hear anymore, it's my time to get my words out, to tell you how I feel.
I loved you as friend, and I still believe that you got a good heart.
I don't want to hate you, and I don't want you to hate me.

I'm glad you've found someone that you feel completes you.
I hope you both all the best in life.
And I hope that in the future, you'll open yourself a little bit more so you won't hurt the people who truly wants to get to know you and let you into theirs despite the difference. And never ever say that a person doesn't want to get to know you, it's such a disrespectful and hurtful thing to say.
Choose your words carefully, everyone's different, learn to adjust.
Just keep that in mind.

I hope to see you in another life.
Ha det vackert!


love Isabel

like, omg baby.


death and funeral.

(via ohruthie)
4554788594_17d64866a8_large
via we<3it

Don't cry, for it's a selfish act.
Instead, pour a glass of good wine and toast for the deceased one.
Celebrate Life and the moments you had with the person whose gone.
For we'll all meet in the end.

In a moment.

R.I.P

maybe that's why?

via iniminiaturale

I just found out why it feels as if the guy I have a thing for sees me like no one else does.

but.. but i like being misrable. (so i tell myself)


master your feelings.


This is great.
This is putting me to the test.
I love it.

Just give me more of it!

But don't get mad when I'll sometimes tell you to just go fuck yourself.

oh so love-ly.


Oh, always so confused by my feelings.
Never knowing or wanting to admit that those thoughts in my head could maybe mean more?

It has come to me lately that I've in fact never been in love.
I've only been infatuated.
I've always lied to myself and to others, called it love or whatever.
Yes, it was love, but not L o v e.

The last year has been somewhat of a journey for me.
I know who I want, but I also know that that person is off limits;
we should have never met.
So this year has been all about moving on, trying to see if I can settle for second best.
I've felt bad for the people who stumbled my way and fell victim for my cruel head-games with myself.
I've always asked myself, "How can something that feels so good feel so wrong?"
I still don't have the answer.

I still don't know if I can settle for someone who's never gonna live up to that guy I never had.
I've never really let go.

I wish I could erase my memory, do an "Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind".
I wish I could go back and change that day I first met him.
I would do anything to become oblivious of him.
I would do anything...

And now I've met this great guy.
I don't know if I'm in love or what.
What I do know is that I feel safe, relaxed, like I can show myself for him and he will actually see me.
He makes me laugh...
And he makes me wanna show him all the beautiful things I see in the world, because I feel that he would see them like I do.

It makes me sad,
that I don't know what I want.
If I just stopped hesitating I would get what I want.
I mean, everything that has happened around me and this guy, has been magic until now.
Chance, accident, luck, call it whatever.
There's nothing saying that anything is impossible.
I just have to welcome it, and trust fate.

There's no denying it, I need him right now in my life.
And here he is, from nowhere.
The question is, does he need me in the same way I do?

Hope so...

And if nothing more, I hope to be great friends.

Pictures via: mirroredperspective, monstertron, grayskymorning


end love.



In L O V E in this song and video.


happy happy happy.



I'm the happiest and luckiest girl ever!
Haha, don't want to brag, but this is how I feel right now!

I found a replacement!
I'm not in grief anymore.
I even found someone better!

Life is good at providing the essentials to make your life easier.
It's just up to you to see them and use them.


Life is great right now.

closed.


amnesty international.

Amnesty International from Digital District™ VFX Post-Pro on Vimeo.


_._..._

ILOVEWILDFOX

just gorgeous.





via french frosting

only man.

AUDIOBULLYS / ONLY MAN from MATHEMATIC SAS on Vimeo.

 

SHOOOOES!!! <33333


these guys are good!


bad day.


rumi neely + forever 21 photoshoot.


jamelia.


this must be from the directors cut. (random tumblr finds)



he who laughs last laughs best.


via /*\

So... I got
my grades.
And they are surprising in both bad and good ways.

My mom is disappointed that I don't have all A's.
But I'm just happy that I can study abroad.

One of my guy-friends got a really high "High School mean value".
I got upset at first, even if it was no surprise, but sometimes I get amazed how that boy just manages.

This is the thing with High School and it's system, this is the thing that's fucked up with the world.
You don't got an easy life being a teenager, if you went by the system you wouldn't be a human at all.
I mean, the ones who didn't have any problems with themselves and Life in general through High School probably had it very easy and could manage getting high grades - especially in my school.
But if you are like me, it's no easy thing, and you're doomed to be an average student.
I got the potential, but because of my grades shifting from very high to very low, the teachers had no choice but to rank me an average or lower in some cases.

They say, do it all now, 'cause you won't do it later in life.
When I thing about my last three years, there's nothing I can change or would change to the better.
Absolutely nothing.

I'm actually proud, over the way I've fought to think differently.
It's my mom in my head, saying that I'm not good enough for the world.
That, even if I've got a score that enables me to study abroad, I have not enough to survive.
She would want me to have a score as high as my guy-friend.

Well, I'll tell you this. He may have a high score but he can't become a doctor.
He hasn't studied all the right courses for that.
So what does scores mean, actually?

I know the war will never be over, I'm gonna have to fight all my life against a bunch of egos.
The ego that says that nineteen is higher then fourteen.
The ego that says that happy people are the ones whit high scores.
The ego that says that stress is good.

I believe in stress, though not for winning.
I don't need to win. I already got everything I want.
In other words: I've already won.
I'll survive.

I don't need to question why or how,
I'm basically the happiest girl alive.


in the summertime...

souvenirs

random boobies.

http://rodeo.net/signe/files/2010/05/Untitled-3.jpg
venom venin
Milk/Signe

sartre.

http://img708.imageshack.us/img708/9834/experimentaljetsetevery.jpg

give me this bracelet.

bernardesheronline.com

do we really need headlines?


via desiretoinspire.net

imagine your life.

via I LOVE WILDFOX!


What you imagine is real. What you imagine comes from the truth of you.

In what you imagine there is great and wonderful treasure. And the more you dare to imagine, the more extensive and valuable that treasure becomes.

What you imagine connects you to your purpose. What is it that you can imagine that makes you feel truly ecstatic?

In what you most enthusiastically imagine you'll discover the best of who you can be. From what you imagine can come a lifetime of unique achievement.

See what you imagine not as a fantasy but as a preview of your most sincere intentions. Then allow the beauty of what you imagine to guide you in making it real.

Imagine your own special flavor of life's great abundance. Imagine, and bring it to life.

-- Ralph Marston


cherries.

via julia

daisy lowe.

Daisy Lowe for UK esquire HD from Greg Williams on Vimeo.

 

I fell in love with her 2005, and she's been my girl-crush ever since!


this is the most unflattering view to take a picture of someone.

http://img243.imageshack.us/img243/2775/38254164.jpg

confessions.

http://img197.imageshack.us/img197/502/30453voguefran22amar13o.jpg
unknown

Weird dreams I had this morning, can't tell if they were dreams or reality.
The funny dream I know was a dream, but the one when I was trying to turn of my alarm clock on my iPod felt so real, but then I actually woke up and realized why it wasn't working. So I hit snooze for real this time.

I hate when I dream intimate dreams about my friends, 'cause 80% of my friends are guys.
It just gets weird in the long run. Then when you met/talk to them you're not sure about your feelings.
And I have a handicap where I have it very difficult to tell dreams and reality apart, so I'm not sure we did anything...
So yeah...

Awkward pause



*100% of my male friends who'll read this will take it personal and become all conceited.
Sigh.

omg that gun-bra.


wicked game.


barbara gonzales.

Barbara Gonzalez
Barbara Gonzalez
Barbara Gonzalez
via Likecool

force feed me?

via iniminiaturale

Anyone having the problem with not having an ED but not eating?
I'm like worried with myself, I've already lost some weight, and it's not because I'm thinking sick, it's because I don't eat as much as I should, and when I eat it's the wrong things.
I don't know if it's loss of apatite? It's just, hard to explain, everything taste like shit to me.
It's like I've tried everything in the world, everything taste the same, I want something new, but I don't know what.
And because I don't eat so well my blood sugar gets low and I get these mood swings where I go around being pissed and easily irritated. Also irritated that there's nothing to eat.

Uh, I'm just worried that if this keeps on, I'll be only skin and bones at the end of this summer, or worse, that I will develop an ED again.

halleluja.



Det jag får ska jag ge tillbaka, allting jag äger ska jag försaka.
Det krävs ingenting för att känna sig fri, man måste vara fattig för att vara rik.
Allting jag lärt mig ska jag glömma bort, det jag ser kommer jag glömma bort, man måste va en idiot för att kalla sig klok, man måste vara liten för att vara stor.

Halleluja Halleluja Halleluja Halleluja

Varje steg är ett steg tillbaka, varje ord är en hopplös dröm, man måste tiga för att vara sann, men man måste tala för att ha en chans.
Allting du lärt dig ska du glömma bort, det du ser kommer du glömma bort, du måste va en idiot om du kallar dig klok, du måste vara lite för att vara stor.

Halleluja Halleluja Halleluja Halleluja

Och när jag slutar tänka börjar jag förstå att Gud inte bryr sig om hur rakt jag kan gå
Så länge jag går, går jag i änglarnas spår, så länge jag lever dricker jag ur djävulens skål, så länge mitt hjärta slår

Halleluja Halleluja Halleluja Halleluja

the real evil people are those disguised as good.

Kata Pult

I've decided that
Even if truth hurts
I won't suffer

I will not have unrealistic hopes that things will get better and someday change.
Hope is the last thing to die.
With hope dies us.
And without hope I don't see why I should keep on suffering like I do.

A yes or no question
Anything between means No
That simple

I get sad
Mostly angry
I feel that I deserve better
So I move on

The worst thing is that you will not care
It was over a long time ago
I'm just too stupid, too emotional, too caring, too naive to realize it.
I'm too fucking nice.
I hate myself.

But also, that's the thing I love the most about myself
That's the thing that says I'm too good for you

I hope you all the best in life.

oui, oui.

via Fashionfever

Read this post first.

In many ways I want to escape, run away, leave everything and everyone, chop all connection, and just start over.
Cold as ice, I don't want to exist to the people I've known. I want them to forget about me, keep living life as they've never met me.
As if I've never met them.
So easy, but so far away.

And at the same time I see myself writing to my cousin:
"I still wanna go places, but I'm not sure if that's so important to me right now. I'm still figuring things out. And sometimes is dreaming about it enough."

Amazed with what I just wrote I came to the conclusion that I finally settled with Life.
That I finally don't just know the meaning, but I know how to handle the truth.
It's not going to be always easy, but this is the first step.

Life is nor meaningless or meaningful, it just Is.
And that Is you have to fill out yourself.

So I thought...

3rd uncle.

via desiretoinspire.net


chris connell.

via desiretoinspire.net


partner in crime.

via inbetweendreams

I want to be crazy in love with someone.

That Juliet & Romeo-love.

That dangerous love.

That one who consumes you kind of love.

That "I'll run away with you if you say so"-love.

That love that becomes an addiction.

That love that kills you if it all ends.

the sun streams through the window.

Pink Martini – Sympathique


I made a set for all of you!
Click on the link on the top (if you don got Spotify, click here) then on the picture.

this is it.


I wish I was like all of you,
but most of all
I wish you could see it from my point of view



What do you want me to tell?
Either way, I'll tell you what you want to hear.
It was one of the best days in my life.

But that would be a lie.

I'm not you. I'm not you. You can't force me to be like you.

Truth is, it was a half-wasted-day.
Luckily I've got friends who I can just be myself with.
Who won't utter how boring I am.
Who thinks I'm the coolest no matter what.
And who'll always keep me company on one of the most beautiful places in Stockholm.
<3

_

via fashionfever & iniminiaturale

Well, it's the day they've all been waiting for.
It's the day I've always dreamt of going somewhere else.
Since I was six.

Yes, beat that.
I'm just saying, I never wanted to be today.

I'm just sad that mom had to take almost all my savings,
I would've been somewhere on a plane or a train on my way to nowhere by now.

freedom is scary.

http://s3.amazonaws.com/data.tumblr.com/tumblr_l3c41yNy5a1qzijazo1_1280.jpg?AWSAccessKeyId=0RYTHV9YYQ4W5Q3HQMG2&Expires=1275482597&Signature=IwZdJzpCFsBAMyTGPmjt%2B74eLpc%3D
via beautyandmadness

I don't feel like graduating tomorrow.
Actually, I don't feel like anything today.

I just wish I could feel secure.
I don't feel like that right now.

there's one thing i could do forever.


i've got a plan to lose it all.

Switchfoot – Dare You To Move (Learning To Breathe Album Version)



Welcome to the planet
Welcome to existence
Everyone's here
Everyone's here
Everybody's watching you now
Everybody waits for you now
What happens next?
What happens next?

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened before

these shoes are made for walking.


Someone will have to carry me home on graduation, I won't be able to walk after 6 hours in high heels.
I couldn't find any cheap beautiful flats like I've always been able to find.
When did they stop making those comfortable fabric shoes?